suddenly this defeat.
this rain.
the blues gone grey
and browns gone grey
and yellow
a terrible amber.
i have been easy with trees
too long.
too familiar with mountains.
joy has been a habit.
now
suddenly
this rain.
here i am, one passionate, dramatic, tiring, exciting, extravagant, boring, predictable, spontaneous, chaotic, secretive, on-and-off months later, marked by all "my fault" and your choices.
when you live on your own for a long time, your personality changes because you go so much into yourself you lose the ability to be social, to understand what is and isn't normal behavior. there is an entire world inside yourself, and if you let yourself, you can get so deep inside it you will forget the way to the surface. other people keep our souls alive, just like food and water does with our body.
